800 days

Well, its 810 actually, but 800 makes for a better headline. Yes, 810 days since i was diagnosed with the Big C grade 4 and told I had better get get my affairs in order. Something i still havent done!
Today, April 10 is when the maybes became reality. A hour visit with a no-holds barrred oncologist at Auckland Hospital laid it on the line. I saw the xray of the latest lung scan and it confirmed what i already suspected and had been dreading - massive spread of tumors through both lungs and, judging by the pain in the upper body, obvious spread of the tumors to the  ribs.
The chemo options were carefully laid out and explained in detail, as well as the multiple unpleasant side effects, the 40% at best success rate - success being destroying most of the lung tumors and waiting for the inevitable re-growth, which may occur in other areas as well as the lungs, after which more chemo is not an option. i might even get an extra 6 months or year, but the quality of that time will be rubbish.

That or up the ante on my own personal health program and go for broke on a revolutionary diet and supplement plan that will be challenging, call for incredible sacrifice and discipline, and have no guarantee of success either. But at least i have some degree of control, rather than depending on a regime of non selective chemo.
So its decision time. No time to waste time. Choosing how long to live time. Very melodramatic.
And at the center of any decision I make stands Jesus, the One who ultimately controls our lives and reminds us that He, not us, is making the big calls and reminding us the He ultimately is in control.

We're in for a rough few months, so hang in there with us. It can be a lonely journey, so knowing you're there makes it a little bit more bearable.
Keep the faith